How to spot and stop bullying behaviors
from Threshold for Youth
by Carmen Wiriyagale,
manager of prevention services at
at The Community Place, Rochester NY - Democrat
& Chronicle March 28, 2012
No none wants to think their child is
capable of being a bully. Denial, anger, guilt and
shame are just some of the things a parent experiences when
they discover their child may be a bully. Bullying can
start at a very early age; addressing bullying behaviors
early on with your child may help him or her to learn better
ways of relating to others.
Why is this important? While it
is well known that bullying can have lingering emotional and
health consequence for victims, research has also shown that
children who engage in bullying behavior are at high risk
for maladaptive behaviors later in life.
Children who bully are more likely to
get into fights, drop out of school, be involved in gang and
criminal activity, use drugs and alcohol, and be arrested
for domestic violence and child abuse. Both boys and
girls can be bullies with boys tending to be more physical
[hitting and threatening] and girls more social [spreading
rumors, excluding someone from activities, cyber-bullying].
Some signs that your child may be
engaging in bullying behaviors include:
Having a positive view of aggressive
behavior and violence.
Acting aggressively towards others -
hitting, pushing or intimidating other children
Having trouble following rules.
Showing little concern for the
feelings of others.
Having an item or money that doesn't
belong to them.
Having experienced bullying from an
adult, peer or sibling.
If you suspect or know your child
is engaging in bullying:
Do not make excuses. Let your child
know you will not tolerate this type of behavior.
Set rules and appropriate consequences such as taking
away privileges and follow through.
Model the behavior you want to see in
your child. Do not allow children or family
members bully or act aggressively toward one another.
Praise your child for following rules
- this will help reinforce positive behaviors.
Stay involved in your child's school
and encourage him or her to get involved in positive
socialization activities. Also, find out who your
child is spending time with.
If you don't see changes or if the
behavior worsens, seek professional help.
Find out more: